LOST Unanswered Questions

Ok. Real quick. As I was watching those 37 episodes, I worked on making as comprehensive a list as possible of questions that haven't been answered. Feel free to add your own.

How did Jack's dad die? (Or is he really dead?)

What's the deal with that giant four toed statue at the end of season 2?

What happened to Walt and Michael?

Why did Kate finally end up running in Australia?

What happened to Kate while she was in captivity at the beginning of season 3? (I don't think this one is important enough to be answered, but I'd still like to know.)

How on earth do The Others have all of the files on all of the passengers?

What were they breaking all of the rocks for at the beginning of season 3? (Kate asked Juliet this and she said "for a runway... for the aliens" and said they didn't always know what they were working for.)

What is the smoke monster?

How did Locke's dad/original Sawyer get to the island?

Why are Cindy and the children still with the Others? What about all the people they kidnapped at the very beginning?

Whose funeral was that in the season 3 finale?

There are many more obvious ones such as how do they get off the island, who gets off, why were they brought there, blah blah blah, but we'll deal with that another time.

Lost Recap Part 2

Whew. Watching 37 episodes of LOST over 5 days can wear a girl out. So, for those of you in ridiculous places such as Arkansas where the local ABC station is somehow weekly allowed to kick off national programming such as the LOST Season 3 Finale: Pop-up Edition for something like, say, college basketball, I will remind you of what happened in the last 18 episodes of last season in a quick way. For stuff further back than that, scroll down the page for info back to the middle of season 2. I will just be mentioning random observations and reminding you of the things. Here we go...

Mittelos BioScience was the group that sent Juliet to the island to do her research.

When Karl was being brainwashed, the video he was watching included the phrase "God loves you as he loved Jacob."

When Jack was in the cage on the island, Cindy, the flight attendant, showed up with the kids that were on the flight and some of The Others and said they were there to watch. Huh?

Isabel was the middle aged lady on the island who was referred to as the sherriff. She does what Ben says, including freeing Juliet who was supposed to be killed for what she did. But Ben wrote a note to her right before Juliet's supposed execution commuting her sentence.

When Jack was in Thailand and got his tattoo, he was told that there would be consequences for it. It translates as "He walks amongst us, but he is not one of us." He said to Isabel that that's what it says, but not what it means.

Remember the time Hurley found the van in the jungle that had a skeleton, who we later found out was Ben's dad and a whole bunch of beer? That was funny.

Locke, Sayid, Kate, and Rousseau found The Flame station in the jungle where Mikhail (aka Eye Patch Guy) was stationed, pretending to be the last person from the Dharma Initiative. This station was for communicating with the outside world and was connected via wires to all of the other stations. The wire to the underwater station sends out sonar pings to guide submarines to the island. He said that all of Dharma was gone because they initiated war with The Hostiles, who were there long before Dharma. More on this later.

Locke played that chess game at the Flame station and that Marvin Candle guy showed up and said that if there had been an incursion by the Hostiles, to enter 77. He did this and it blew up all of the communications.

Mikhail said that these four who came to him weren't on "the list" because they're flawed (Kate), angry (Locke), weak (Rousseau), and frightened (Sayid). (Those last two may be reversed. I couldn't tell who he was talking to.)

Once Kate, Sayid, and Locke showed up at the Others neighborhood and they were captured, the Others packed up, gassed Kate, handcuffed Juliet to Kate and dropped them off in the jungle.
Smoke Monster doesn't like the sonic fence.

If Juliet stays on the island, Ben will get rid of her sister's cancer. Jacob said he'd take care of it himself, unless she didn't have faith in him.

Desmond had become a monk, but didn't do well with it. As he was turning in his robe to leave, when he dropped it on the head monk's desk, you can see a framed picture of the head monk with the jewelry store lady who had told Desmond all about his future and how he couldn't change what was going to happen in his life.

When Naomi, the parachuter, landed on the island she told them that Flight 815 had been found in a 4 mile deep trench and that there were no survivors. They had all died.

Ben had come to the island with his dad (aka Roger Workman aka Uncle Rico) to work for the Dharma Initiative when he was 12. He hated it and wandered off into the jungle one day, meeting Richard, who was a part of "The Hostiles". He became one of them and helped gas all of the Dharma people, killing them, and then took over their houses and society, thus becoming The Others. They put all of the bodies of the Dharma people into a pit.

Ben took Locke to see Jacob and Jacob spoke to Locke, saying "Help me." Ben got mad that Locke heard him and shot him in the stomach. He fell back into the Pit Of Dead Dharmas.

In the past, Charlie saved Nadia, Sayid's girlfriend, from a mugging in an alley.

Ben: "This island is under assault by forces stronger than anything it's had to deal with in many many years and we are meant to protect it by any means necessary. The jamming (of all of the radio signals off the island) was for everyone's security."

Jack finally told Kate "I love you" when they were headed up to the radio tower to turn off Rousseau's signal.

Locke, while in the Pit of Dead Dharmas was about to shoot himself when Big Ol' Tall Walt came up to the edge of the pit and told him that he could get up and that he needed to come out because he has work to do.

Future Jack was the only person to show up at the viewing of some dead person that we don't know yet. He said he was neither friend or family.

Ben said that Naomi was not who she says she is. She is a representative of people who have been trying to find the island. One of the bad guys. If you phone that boat, every single living person on this island will be killed.

When Sayid, Jin, and Bernard stayed behind to blow up the others when they came to kidnap the women, we thought they were shot, but Tom (aka Mr. Friendly aka Zeke) didn't shoot them. Sawyer and Juliet had gone back to save them and then Hurley came riding out of the jungle in Ben's dad's van and ran some of them over. Sawyer then shot and killed Tom because he took Walt from the boat.

Future Jack said to the chief that if he brought his dad down and he (Jack) was more drunk than him, he could fire him. So is Jack's dad still alive, or was he just saying that in his drunkenness?

After hearing from Desmond since about episode 7 of season 3 that he was going to die, Charlie finally admitted defeat and headed to the underwater hatch (the Looking Glass) to turn off the signal that The Others were using to block all of the outgoing signals so they could contact the offshore boat that Naomi had come from. After puching in the code to turn it off, a video contact came up with Penny Widmore (who had been looking for Desmond, as evident in that weird Antartica ending of season 2). She was talking to Charlie when he asked her if she was on the boat. As she asked "What boat?" Creepy Eye Patch Guy showed up outside the window of the room Charlie was in with a grenade. He closed the water-tight door and wrote on his hand "Not Penny's Boat" to warn Desmond to tell the other survivors. Maybe Ben really is telling the truth.

Locke threw a knife into the back of Naomi as she was connecting to the boat on the phone and threatened to shoot Jack if he called, but he called anyway.

When Future Jack and Future Kate see each other at the end, Jack asked if Kate knew about the funeral he went to and Kate said "Why would I go to the funeral?" and then said she needed to go home because "He's gonna be wondering where I am." Who's HE? Sawyer?

Jack regrets leaving and keeps flying over the Pacific hoping to crash again. He said they weren't supposed to leave and that they need to go back.

Ok. I promise I'll never write a post this long again about Lost. Sorry to you non-fans. You're welcome to you fans. The time is finally here. Lost is back! Yes! Enjoy the premiere!

Kid Quotes 201-220

These are the last of the first grader quotes. Aw.

I was showing them our engagement pictures...
Kid: Did you take one kissing?
Me: Yes.
Kid 2: Will you show it to us?
Me: No.
Kid 3: Yeah, she doesn't want us to know all her darkest secrets!

Kid: What are you drinking?
Me: Cherry Vanilla Diet Coke
Kid: Are you on a diet?
Me: Sort of.
Kid: Are you trying to get skinny for your wedding?
Me: Yes.
Kid 2: Oh! I know why you are on a diet!
Me: Why?
Kid 2: So you can be faster!
Me: What?
Kid 2: You know, in case y'all want to race or something, you can be faster.

"Hey! Guess what! I named my scabs! This one is named hurty, and this one is named painy."
later in the day...
"Everyone keeps on hurting painy!"

Kid: What's a deadly germ? I killed a deadly germ once.
Me: How?
Kid: I squashed it. With my pencil.

Kid 1 to Kid 2: Your breath smells like soy milk.

Kid: How long does it take to get a baby?
Me: um, what?!
Kid: How long does it take for you to get a baby?
Me: um, 9 months.
Kid: NO, how long does it take for a doctor to get a baby out of you?
Me: It's different for everyone, sometimes 24 hours or more, sometimes a few hours.
Kid : (shocked face)

Kid 1: Women are more important than men. We couldn't survive without them because they have babies.
Kid 2: Nu‑uh! Men are more important!
Kid 1: No, women are!
Kid 2: No, because men, like, make chairs and stuff.

Me: Name some foods that come from plants.
Kid 1: Meat.
Me: No, what does meat come from?
Kid 2: Animals!
Me: Right.
Kid 1: No! My dad said he saw a meat tree once!

"Out of all the people in my family, I'm the most corn."

"My dad said I cost alot of money. Do you have to buy a baby?"

"Miss Hartman, what's your last name?"

(I had a huge bruise on my arm right now where they messed up at the doctor taking my blood...)
Me: The marker's not working...
Kid: Maybe it's afraid of that bruise! (this is one of my favorite quotes ever)

after stepping on my foot...
Me: You stepped on my foot.
Kid: oh
Me: And you should say...?
Kid: ...president?
Kid: I mean, thank you?
Me: Try again.
Kid: Sorry.
Me: Much better. Go to music.

"Are the Dallas Mavericks a high school team?"

Kid: Miss Hartman, what's your favorite pro football team?
Me: I don't really have one.
Kid: Mine's the Aledo Bearcats! (The mascot at the high school from our district)

Me: Name some words that have "er" in them.
Kid: Joiner!
Me: Well, that's not really a word
Kid: Yeah it is! It's someone who joins something, like "Santa is a joiner"

Question to Show‑and‑Teller: Why do girls like Barbies so much?
Show‑and‑Teller: Yeah, girls always like Barbies and boys always like motorcycles.
Other Kid: Boys just like hitting. (hits self in face)

seeing them getting ready for my shower across the hall...
Kid: What's happening in there?
Other teacher: We're getting ready for Miss Hartman's shower.
Kid: Doesn't she do that at her house?

Kid: Happy Birthday!
Me: It's not my birthday. They're having a shower for me.
Kid: I know. Happy birthday anyway!

while lying on the floor under Hunter's desk... "Hunter won't stop stepping on me!"

Coming up next on Kid Quotes... Fourth Grader Quotes!

Lost Recap Part 1

I had been rewatching Lost from the beginning and decided late last week that I was going to rush through and try to rewatch all of it before season 4 starts on Thursday. I have been watching a bunch of them on one fast forward on the DVD player so that it is going twice as fast but I can still hear the sound and read the captions. Starting ten episodes in to season 2, I watched 6 episodes Friday night, 9 episodes Saturday, and 5 episodes Sunday night.
I have been writing down things I have forgotten, things that did not mean anything the first time but meant something now that we know more, and things that might be important in the future. So here is the list so far in chronological order from the middle of season 2.

I had been watching and seeing when they saw the scratched up legs with no shoes in the jungle and thought there might be other Others since the real Others live in houses. I kept watching and I had forgotten that Kate found those costumes in that locker in the medical hatch.

I forgot about that time Sawyer spent a whole episode searching for that tree frog. And then squished it at the end.

When Ben/Henry was being held by them, they gave him a book and he said something like "You don't have any Stephen King?" This is weird because if you remember in the season 3 premiere Ben wasn't invited to the book club because Juliet knew he wouldn't like the Stephen King book. Hmmm...

The pregnancy test that Sun took was made by the Widmore company (Penny's dad/sponsor of Desmond's boat race). Again.... hmmmm...

The first time the countdown clock went to zero and started flipping to the symbols was when Sayid was interrogating Henry and Jack wanted in there to stop him. He held Locke down until he let him in the locked room and by the time Locke got the code in, the time had run out. No biggie. I just forgot about it.

When Claire was being held by Ethan, the following conversation happened (as best as I can remember):
Zeke/Mr. Friendly: What happened? You were supposed to make the list and THEN bring her here.
Ethan: I couldn't! They knew I wasn't on the plane. They had the manifest!
Zeke/Mr. Friendly: What am I supposed to tell HIM?
We still don't know who they're talking about. Jacob?

I forgot that Claire hadn't scratched Rousseau because she was trying to take her. She scratched her because she was trying to help her get back to the camp after Alex helped Claire escape from the medical hatch.

Jin was the problem in the Jin/Sun baby making problem. I forgot. I also don't think I realized that the guy that taught Sun English was the same one that their parents had originally set them up with each other. They liked each other, but the guy said he was moving to America to marry some girl. I guess that didn't work out.

Since Rose was healed by the island, she said she didn't want to leave. Bernard told her that even if everyone else left, they'd stay if she wanted to.

I completely forgot about Jack's dad and Ana Lucia meeting in the airport and her moving to Australia with him kind of as a bodyguard. They said they wouldn't go by their real names. She named him Tom, which I'm not sure if it has a significance, but he named her Sarah, as in Jack's wife's name. One night she took him to the house of what we later found out was Claire's mom, wanting to see his daughter.

I think Ben/Henry Gale (I don't know who else it could have been at that point) told Locke that he was one of the good ones and that he had been coming to their side of the island for him.

Libby's husband's name was David. He was the one that owned the boat that she gave to Desmond to race around the world for Penny's father. That name David may come up again at some point. I've heard that Libby will still be in some more flashbacks in the future.

When Sayid, Jin, and Sun sailed around to the other side of the island to meet where Jack, Kate, Sawyer, and Hurley were going with Michael to meet the others, remember Sun was on the boat when the Others took over. The girl that Sun shot told her that the others are not their enemy, but will be if she shoots her. And then she did.

I forgot about when Locke used to live in that commune that was growing the drugs.

I also forgot about when Sawyer went to prison for the long con of that lady and then the warden let him out for conning another prisoner into telling him where some 10 million dollars was that the guy had gotten from someone. He also has a daughter by that lady named Clementine.

Locke and Charlie were chased by another polar bear, the one who eventually dragged Eko into the cave and almost killed him. Locke used that torch and hairspray contraption to scare him off.
One of the Others said to one of the other Others when Jack, Kate, and Sawyer were in their captivity and Jack was about to do Ben's surgery that Jack wasn't even on Jacob's list.
Hmm... Jacob. What's that guy's deal?

Ok. That's it. I'm also compiling a list of all of the yet unanswered questions/things they haven't explained. Or at least as many as I can think of. I'll share them all and Recap Part 2 when I'm through. That'll probably be late Wednesday night.

The Big Oh-Two

Today was our niece Alyssa Kate's 2nd Birthday.

This was the day after she was born.

Her first birthday party.

Her second birthday party. It was fairy themed.

Or possibly pirate fairy themed.

She wasn't so sure about the fire.

But was pretty sure about the dainty eating of the birthday cake.

A little better than last year.

Kid Quotes 181-200

in the middle of our Christmas party...
"Can I take a test?"
"Is the party still going on?"

about valentines: "I know why it's Valen, with an L... because of loooooooove!"

"My mom doesn't work and stays at home. Well, she takes care of the horses, so I guess she's kind of a Home Mom Horse Girl."

Kid: I like that song, Green Bay. They play it but they don't beep out the bad words. They beep out one but then they don't beep out the others.
Me: Are you talking about Green DAY?
Kid: No, Green Bay.
a few minutes later...
Kid: Yeah I like that song. It's like "I don't want to be an American," and then they say the bad word.

"My head hurts when I walk on it"

"I went to New Mexico once! They have a GREAT candy store! I got ice cream!"

Kid 1 (talking about Kid 2's brother): He's a cutie pie!
Kid 2: He's not a PIE! You can't eat him!

after telling them AGAIN about me moving to Texarkana, which is on the border of Texas and Arkansas... "Arkansas! I went there once! I had to go to the bathroom!"

Kid: So you're going to live on the border?
Me: Yeah, close to it.
Kid: You're gonna live in a RESTAURANT?!

Q: What do you call a skunk without a tail?
A: A stunker

Q: What do you call a porcupine that lost it's spines?
A: A pinester

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Gesundheit who?
Bless you!

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because they hadn't invented chickens yet!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Swimmy who?
Swimmy...........(very long pause).......................immy!

Me talking about the train of my wedding dress: It's really long and goes back to about there.
Kid: So that's why they have people carry it, so it doesn't get dirty?
Me: Yes.
Kid: You should have two little birds carry it!
Me: Like on Cinderella?
Kid: YEAH!

Kid: My shoe won.
Me: Your shoe won?
Kid: Yeah! In a fight between my shoe and my nose, my shoe won.
Me: When did this happen?
Kid: At recess!

Kid: It takes four hours to get to San Antonio.
Me: No, it's more like 5 hours.
Other kid: Oh! I know why! There's 5 letters in Texas, so it takes five hours, DAYS!, to get to San Antonio.

"Poodles are all about the luxury"

Field Trip Question of the Day:
(we went to the Log Cabin Village and the butterfly exhibit...)
"How many people does it take to make a bus?"

Kid Quotes 181-200

First Graders still (I don't know why this didn't post in the first place! I just noticed that it didn't post.)

in the middle of our Christmas party...
"Can I take a test?"
"Is the party still going on?"

about valentines: "I know why it's Valen, with an L... because of loooooooove!"

"My mom doesn't work and stays at home. Well, she takes care of the horses, so I guess she's kind of a Home Mom Horse Girl."

Kid: I like that song, Green Bay. They play it but they don't beep out the bad words. They beep out one but then they don't beep out the others.
Me: Are you talking about Green DAY?
Kid: No, Green Bay.
a few minutes later...
Kid: Yeah I like that song. It's like "I don't want to be an American," and then they say the bad word.

"My head hurts when I walk on it"

"I went to New Mexico once! They have a GREAT candy store! I got ice cream!"

Kid 1 (talking about Kid 2's brother): He's a cutie pie!
Kid 2: He's not a PIE! You can't eat him!

after telling them AGAIN about me moving to Texarkana, which is on the border of Texas and Arkansas... "Arkansas! I went there once! I had to go to the bathroom!"

Kid: So you're going to live on the border?
Me: Yeah, close to it.
Kid: You're gonna live in a RESTAURANT?!

Q: What do you call a skunk without a tail?
A: A stunker

Q: What do you call a porcupine that lost it's spines?
A: A pinester

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Gesundheit who?
Bless you!

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because they hadn't invented chickens yet!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Swimmy who?
Swimmy...........(very long pause).......................immy!

Me talking about the train of my wedding dress: It's really long and goes back to about there.
Kid: So that's why they have people carry it, so it doesn't get dirty?
Me: Yes.
Kid: You should have two little birds carry it!
Me: Like on Cinderella?
Kid: YEAH!

Kid: My shoe won.
Me: Your shoe won?
Kid: Yeah! In a fight between my shoe and my nose, my shoe won.
Me: When did this happen?
Kid: At recess!

Kid: It takes four hours to get to San Antonio.
Me: No, it's more like 5 hours.
Other kid: Oh! I know why! There's 5 letters in Texas, so it takes five hours, DAYS!, to get to San Antonio.

"Poodles are all about the luxury"

Field Trip Question of the Day:
(we went to the Log Cabin Village and the butterfly exhibit...)
"How many people does it take to make a bus?"

I Finally Thought of One

New poll is up questioning your addiction to television (in the side bar) .

Very Curious

I have a mystery blog viewer in Irving who never leaves a comment, but comes on a couple of times a day almost every day. Please tell me who you are! :)

Update (1/25): Ok, you came by tonight but didn't tell me who you are. E-mail me at the bottom if you don't want to leave a comment. I'm crazy curious.

Little Rockers!

I figure it's probably been used before, but I thought that "Little Rockers" would be an excellent name for citizens of Little Rock. Eh?
This message is a public service announcement for all Little Rockers. It is in regards to the fact that two of the greatest things ever are coming to Little Rock very soon. We just got a Forever 21, but these are even better!
As I walking up to the Target in west Little Rock yesterday, I saw a sign on the outside of the building informing me that "Target will remain open during construction." I though, "eh?" I looked to the end of the building and saw a gated off area for future construction. I walked inside to see a temporary wall put up near the front door and this beautiful wonderful amazing sign:

TARGET IS BECOMING A SUPERTARGET!!! If you've never experienced a SuperTarget, you're in for a wonderful treat. Grocery store! Starbucks! Jelly Belly candy bin aisle! It didn't have an opening date, but it's wonderful news. SuperTarget is about the best store ever. Ten bajillion times better than that stupid Super WalMart. (Yes. This sign has the same set of four pictures on there twice. Don't ask me about that one.)

Then... I had heard this rumor several months ago and then heard it on the radio a few weeks ago, so you may have heard by now. We're also getting a The Container Store! Apparently many Little Rockers are unaware of the awesomeness that is The Container Store. Just visit the site and see just a small bit of what is available there. It's wondrous. The grand opening is March 8th and 9th:


And... One week until LOST!

AI Week 2

Time for some San Diego and Charleston American Idol auditions!

January 22 - San Diego Auditions

Tetiana "Long Blonde Girl" Ostapowych - I think Paula died at one point during this girl's audition. She was pretty good and made it through, but I don't think she'll last long.

Perrie "My Son Looks Like A Daughter" Cataldo - Just cut that kid's hair please. This was the single dad of an adorable little boy with ridiculously long hair. He was very good. One of the best guys I've seen so far.

Michael "Australia" Johns - Wait, this guy's even better than Perrie! I'm always amazed how foreign accents don't really come through in song. This guy is going to go far, I'm sure.

Valerie "Not Mariah Carey" Reyes - She sounded like she was honking during this horrible Mariah impersonation. Then there was that last screech, I mean note.

Monique "Three People Dressed Me" Gibson - She's not Whitney Houston

Christopher "I Came With Monique" Baker - Too many bad singers believe that children are our future. Singing it over and over will not make it better. I think that's one of my rules.

Samantha "I Love Simon" Musa - Sang Aretha and was actually pretty good at it. I'm surprised Simon let her crazy friend sit on his lap.

Blake "Statue of Liberty" Boshnack - If only he'd come as a human 10 times ago, maybe he would have found out that he's not that great and wouldn't have had to waste all that time and money continuing to audition. These people are so delusional.

Alberto "Biggest American Idol FAN" Hurtado - First, his long fingernails really bothered me. Second, his hair/sideburns really bothered me. Third, his spinning Barbie amused me. Fourth, his heart on his sleeve was funny.

David "Vocal Cord Paralysis" Archuleta - The way he sounded when talking made me think he wouldn't be good, but he was. Not as good as Perrie and Michael though.

Carly "Disqualified Two Years Ago" Smithson - I'm glad this girl came back. I don't really remember her, but she's pretty good.

January 23 - Charleston Auditions

Ray "Black Clay Aiken" Henderson - I will admit he did sound a lot like Clay, but the way he was moving around and showboating made me a little dizzy.

DeAnna "With a Capital A" Prevatte - She's not Kellie Pickler. And please put your tank top strap back up on your shoulder, darlin'.

After yet another crowd of 10,000 people trying to say something
completely indistinguishable together, we're back.

Randy Stark and Crystal Ortiz - Aw. They met on the American Idol message boards. How adorable. They should have stayed there. How does it go? "I'm so much cooler online?"

Michelle and Jeffrey "We're Not Married" Lampkin - I was on the phone when they came on and thought they were married. Nope. Siblings. After replaying it, I noticed, before Simon said the same thing, that Jeffrey is way better than Michelle. And funnier.

Ah, another good montage of people singing a song by a former American Idol. This time Carrie Underwood's Before He Cheats. Nice.

Amy Catherine "I Just Want To Put Her In My Little Pocket" Flynn - This was the girl who gives speeches about abstinence. She was just adorable. I'm glad that she sang well because I want to see her for a while. She has such a soft voice though, so she needs to work on building up her power before Hollywood (which I know has actually already happened) to last longer.

London "Excellent" Weidberg - She stopped singing to take care of her sick dad and now she's back! She sang Billie Holiday and I wrote down the same word that Randy used: excellent.

On Day 2, I have no idea what Paula was wearing, but it was horrible. Possibly socks for sleeves?

Lyndsey "I Fly Huge Planes" Goodman - I thought this girl was pretty good, but the judges didn't ask my opinion unfortunately.

Aretha "Not Aretha" Codner - There's some boobs. And some belt. She tried Whitney and failed. She thought she could argue her way in, but it just didn't work.

Joshua "My Talent Is Too Big For This Competition" Boson - Other nickname possibilities: "Not Jennifer Hudson," "The Judges Sucks," or "The Next WORLD Idol"

Oliver "This Is My Twelve Hour Old Baby" Highman - That was a great story to show through the whole episode since it happened and all, but I was upset that he ended up not being good enough to make it. I liked him, but again, I wasn't asked.

Three more audition episodes left: Omaha, Miami, and Atlanta. See you then!

And Now... Some Words

I tried one of those Double Berry Smoothies at Sonic. Excellent. Raspberry + Strawberry + Yogurt = Delish.

The boys' Wii that their parents gave them for Christmas came in today. We picked it up after school and I set it up when we got to the house. We made our Miis and D and I started to play. He beat me. In both bowling and golf. He DESTROYED me in golf and just barely beat me in bowling. He's 4.

I went to play Bunko tonight with some girls from Sunday School. My partner and I won the first round and then I didn't win for the next 11 rounds. So I was a perpetual loser today. However, this loss resulted in the Loser Prize of a $10 Target gift card. Better than the prize of Shame in the Wii loss to a four year old.

I have a job for next year (as in August)! I will be Homeschooling D for his Kindergarten year of school. I'm very excited. They also said that if I happen to have a baby any time in that time period, I can just bring it with me to their house. Yay! My job is to now find out about homeschooling organizations in Little Rock.

I really want to know what chemical reaction is happening when every winter my Fightin' Texas Aggie Ring (from college) turns my hand black. It's solid gold and it only happens in cold weather. So weird and stupid.And finally... I surpassed 1,000 visitors on my blog since November 30th. Yes!

Weekend Movie Reviews

I saw two movies that were polar opposites this weekend.

Juno (PG-13): I laughed. I cried. It was overall a pretty great movie. Ellen Page is the young actress playing Juno. She did a very good job playing the quirky straightforward pregnant teenager. Michael Cera also was hilarious as the baby daddy. Jennifer Garner was so touching as the adoptive mother who just wanted a baby. Jason Bateman was fun to watch but his role kind of bothered me. I won't say more about that because I don't want to ruin it for you. Rainn Wilson's cameo at the beginning was absolutely hilarious. There were a few inappropriate/kind of gross parts, especially at the beginning. (Such as her sitting on the toilet taking the pregnancy test.) In all I really liked it and I can see why people are predicting it is going to probably win some big awards. I think just about everyone will like this movie.

Cloverfield (PG-13): Warning: Unless you are superhuman, you will get at least a small headache during this movie if you see it in the theater. I've been looking forward to seeing this movie since I first saw the trailer for it probably 5 months ago when they were just calling it "1-18-08." The whole movie is done on a hand-held camera making it very very jumpy. Thus the headache warning. If you're prone to motion sickness, I'd even recommend some Dramamine. I just got a little bit of a headache. Jon got sick to his stomach. If you think that this is going to be a scary movie, it's not. Just a monster movie. I don't want to tell too much since the whole premise of its promotion leading up to its release was secretive. The whole thing was exciting but a few times there were things that were ridiculous. (Cell phones don't work in the subway in New York!) They left the end wide open for a sequel, which I would definitely see. If you like destruction movies, you'll like it.

Movies in theaters that I STILL want to see: The Bucket List, Mad Money, I Am Legend, Atonement, The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, Sweeney Todd, Charlie Wilson's War, The Great Debaters, and No Country for Old Men.

Ten Days!

So THIS is now online (click to make it bigger):

1. That does NOT look like enough people. Who's getting on the boat?!
2. There's the skyline of Los Angeles (?) reflected in the water. Who's leaving?!
3. There's also a 6 or a 9 reflected in the water. What's going on?!

If you're bored while waiting for the return of LOST on January 31st, you can waste some time on find815.com. It's supposed to be the site for a guy who is searching for the lost Oceanic flight 815 that his fiancee was on. It's a game where you search for clues and stuff. I usually don't do these kind of things, but I really like this one. You should try it out.

So What Do You Think?

Obvious to you regular visitors, I've totally reformatted the blog and am still working on putting some stuff back up. As I work on it, what do you think of the new look?

Kid Quotes 161-180

Wow! Write about American Idol and you get a whole bunch of hits too. I had 77 today! Here are the next 20 quotes. Still first graders.

seeing two of those helicopters with two blades flying over... "Look! It's double helicopters! And they both have two helics!"

Kid: Who was the first person to walk on the moon?
Me: Neil Armstrong.
Kid: Oh yeah! I saw his rip stone once!
Other kid: How did Elvis die?
Kid: Sitting on the toilet!

Kid 1: Are teeth made of bone?
Kid 2: No! Are teeth milk?

"Some milk you buy isn't real because they feed the cows cardboard instead of food."

Assignment: write a note to someone
What a kid wrote: "Dear mr president how much people votid for you and what is it like being the ruler of the world."

Me: What does it look like is outside the window in the picture?
Kid 1: Iraq!
Kid 2: What's Iraq?
Kid 1: It's another country!
(reminded me of that conversation in Bringing Down The House)

"We're chasing the boys and trying to isurrend them"
(later clarified as "get them to surrender")

"My friend Jake told me he's BEEN to Saturn"

"I saw the Milky Way once. It was bright red!"

Me: Pluto is kind of like a snowball (meaning made of ice)
Kid: So we're bigger than Pluto?
Me: Yes, Earth is bigger than Pluto.
Kid: No, are PEOPLE bigger than Pluto?

during the Q&A at the planetarium after a show about the solar system...
"How come scientists haven't figured out aliens?"

Kid 1: You can't taste laughing!
Kid 2: But you CAN taste growing up!

After I explained that all quarters used to look the same, before they started doing state quarters: "That's dangerous! Because then Canada people could take them and use them like their money!"

"Miss Hartman, my mom said we're not supposed to eat those bananas yesterday. They're not ripe yet!"

"If you talk about heart attacks, you're probably going to have one."

"My dad's coming home tomorrow AND it's gonna be 61!!!"

"My grandmother was born in 1992. No, I mean she was born in 1922. She's 75 years old!"

after taking a computer test...
Kid: Why didn't I get a 100?
Me: You got two wrong.
Kid: What would I have to get to not get any wrong?
Me: Zero
Kid: oh.

Me (randomly) listing the different swimming strokes: backstroke, butterfly, freestyle...
Kid: And the Chicken Airplane Soldier!

having to write something nice about everyone in the class, several had a problem with one specific child...
"Can I say 'Your name is (name)'?"
written about her...
"You have blond hair."
"Your hair is as pretty as ------'s."

Four Hours of American Idol

So here I am with my recap of the first two night of American Idol 7. To quote Randy Jackson: "Season 7 - what?!" I decided that I would take notes (I don't know how long this will last.) so I can accurately make fun of these people. Please tell me if you read this. I won't waste my time next week if nobody read it. Or I'll just make it a lot shorter.
8 of my 10 rules were broken in the first two nights. Numbers 3 and 5 haven't been broken. Yet. Here we go...

January 15 - Philadelphia Auditions

First things first. There's Paula's white bra.

Joey "I Lost 204 Pounds" Catalano - They started with someone good! His voice is nice and smooth.

After commercial break we get a "Welcome to Philadelphia" from a guy that is probably the creepy Ben Franklin from the episode of The Office aptly named "Ben Franklin". Oogey.

Alaa "I Want to Love a Girl From Hair to Her Nipple" Youakeem - Gross.

Melanie Nyema - Taylor Hicks' back-up singer. I already know she's better than him.

James "Crash Test Dummies" Lewis - I heard this guy singing "Let My People Go" on the radio recap this morning and was laughing so hard. He and his weird twisted tongue were hilarious.

Junot Joiner - You gotta love a guy whose mom is so excited she takes off her shoes. He and the two other guys that they showed with him were all really good.

Temptress "This Girl Really Scares Me" Brown - I felt sorry for her because she WAS sweet, but she was the first one they showed to break my rule #4. Jennifer Hudson is not someone you want to try to imitate.

Mark "Cricket Noises" Hayes - It always cracks me up when someone sings a Christmas song. And badly.

Udgeet "Can You Explain?" Sampat - Sang Frank Sinatra's My Way. I also heard this on the radio this morning and couldn't stop laughing. It was even funnier watching it.

During the montage of people singing "I Love Rock N Roll" someone broke rule #10. They had their lyrics on a piece of paper.

Alexis "I Can't Pick a Nickname There Are So Many" Cohen - Possibilities: "I'm like a pirate." "I'm going for actressing." "If I could legally moon ya, I would." "Willem Dafoe" "Builds up anger"...

Angela "Not the One from The Office" Martin - This girl was great. She just needs to "de-weddingize". I agree. The moving and snapping bothered me.

End of day one: We find out that Simon has no feelings for other people and can't celebrate with others. Hmph.

Alyse "Really Long Last Name" W. - I'd like my eardrums unburst, please.

Milo "Old Guy" Turk - No sex allowed! I already thought "creepy" before Simon even said it. I liked the line "Sex is weak. Love is strong."

Kristy Lee Cook - I'm putting my money on this girl. And I love that she's a cagefighter.

Paul "Creepiest Audition Ever" Marturano - What the... stalker? I will be having nightmares about this guy. I hope Paula hired a bodyguard for the rest of her time in Philly.

Beth "Little Liz" Stalker - I like this girl alot more than the judges did. I'm glad she made it through.

Then there was the bikini wearing hairy dancing guy. He broke all rules ever written, but my rules #1 and #7 - Costumes and Dancing

Chris "When I'm Witchu" Watson - This guy was really good but I don't remember anything else about him.

Christina "Leia... duh" Tolisano - Removable hair buns. Hm.

Brooke White - As a fellow nanny, I adore this girl. I was proud of her for ignoring Simon while he was being dirty. She is super cute and has an excellent voice.

January 16 - Dallas Auditions

First things first here - When they came back from the first commercial and showed cattle walking down the street, that was a shot from Fort Worth, not Dallas. Get it right. They are not the same. I was hoping to see someone I knew somewhere in these crowds, but I didn't.

The second guy up broke rule #4 again. They just don't listen.

Beth "Not Kelly Clarkson" Maddox - Just the first of many tonight.

Alaina Whitaker - She was really good, but I again don't remember anything else about her.

Bruce "Key Necklace" Dickson - His voice was just ok but he made anyway. I was more creeped out that his dad held his heart until he gave it to his future wife. That's more of a mom kind of thing. However, what made the whole piece was the background music of "Right Here Waiting." So funny!

Zpia - I only got this mohawked girl's nickname. She wasn't good but somehow made it anyway. Simon referred to past background vocalists coming in acting like "whipped donkeys". Is that what he thought of the amazing Melinda Dolittle?

Brandon "Bag O' Fingernails" Green - GROSS! Despite this digustingness he still made it. I hope I don't have to look at that again in Hollywood.

Kayla Hatfield - The girl was in an accident when she was 18 and now wears yellow clothes and smiles a lot. Her voice was horrible but she made it. I don't see her making it past the first day in Hollywood.

Kady "I Do Impressions" Malloy - She was good at all of the voices she did. She broke rule #2 by singing Unchained Melody, but it was forgiven because she did well. She'll go far, I hope.

Douglas "Can I Warm Up" Davidson - Broke rule #9 - Once you're bad, you're always bad. And nobody should sing Bon Jovi either.

Angela "Just Married" Reilly - She didn't seem to excited about her husband. Her husband seemed pretty excited about her, though.

Kyle "Governor of Oklahoma" Ensley - One of those you're suprised that they had a good voice. Way to go, kid.

Tammy "Boring" Tuzinski - Broke rule #6 - You are not Celine Dion.

Colton "Shouting" Swon - He sounded like Rascal Flatts to me. He made it, but we'll see.

Drew "Farmer Cutie" Poppelreiter - Sang the George Strait song and rocked it. I hope he goes far.

Kyle "Guyliner" Reinneck - He creeped me out. He also, along with half of the audtioners, attempted Kelly Clarkson. He also did one of my two favorite things that audtioners do: Held up the fake microphone. (The other would be holding the fake earpiece.)

Oh, the Kelly Clarkson montage. Good ol' rule #4.

Nina "Rules Were Made To Be Broken" Shaw - The Burleson girl who sang Whitney Houston and was really good.

And the best guy of the night... Renaldo "I Am Your Brother" Lupuz/Lapuz/Something - Golden piece of comedy right there. I was rolling. Especially at the end when Paula started dancing in front of him. Loved it.

One week down. Eighteen weeks to go. I love this show.

I Feel A Little Bit Awesome

I was checking out my visitors today and saw one came from Fort Worth. At first, I thought it was probably my mom and dad, but when I looked I saw that they came from a Fort Worth Star Telegram page. I went and found out that the TV blogger for their website linked to my American Idol list yesterday! Awesome! Here's the page!

American Idol!

According to the poll, you guys are right there with me in the shows you are most looking forward to. My first (if you've been paying ANY attention, you would know this) is LOST and then American Idol and then Big Brother and Jericho. This happens to also be the exact same order of the results of the voting this time. But the focus of this post is my adoration for the American Idol. Since so many of you voted for it, I now feel that I can talk about it on here. I know some of you who haven't watched it in the past may start watching it this season due to the complete lack of other shows because of the writer's strike. Now you'll just find out what you've been missing.

So as the show begins I present...

Ashley's Top Ten Pieces of Advice For Auditioners of American Idol

1. Do not wear a costume. It will not distract the judges from how badly you sing.
2. Do not sing any of Simon's favorite songs. That includes Unchained Melody and Mack the Knife. He has a standard for those and you are below it.
3. Unless your name starts with C and ends with hristina Aguilera, do not FOR ANY REASON sing Lady Marmalade. Seriously. You will be bad.
4. Do not attempt any song made famous by a former American Idol. Especially Kelly Clarkson. They are way better than you.
5. Do not sing a song that is typically heard at a wedding, such as Celebration or YMCA. You will sound even worse than you actually are.
6. Less than 1% of people can handle singing Whitney, Aretha, Celine, and Mariah. You are not one of them.
7. Do not dance. If you feel like dancing, head over to that crapfest Dance War on ABC. This is a singing competition.
8. Do not beg or cry. We don't want to hear your sob story. It won't affect your ability to sing.
9. If you suck at your first song, don't ask to sing another one. You'll still suck.
10. Memorize your lyrics, moron.

We'll see how many of these are not followed in the first night. I have Bible study during the show Tuesday night, but I may stay up and watch it when I get home, depending on how late it is. If not, I'll be back Wednesday with my opinions of the show for both days. Who else is going to be watching and if you are, do you have any advice I may have left out for those auditioning?

The Weekend in Summary

I dropped off D at his dad's office at 11:30 Friday morning. This is how awesome the sky looked.

I left for Fort Worth and made a stop in Texarkana to see my good friend Heidi from the school I taught at there. She's 9 months pregnant and was out on the field coaching her varsity softball team at the high school. It was pretty funny and impressive.

I then stopped by my old school to say hi. I've never been more happy to be out of there. The Principal From Hades is making EVERYONE's lives miserable now. Like she did mine for the two years I was there. I feel so sorry for them, but I'm so glad I'm gone. While I was there though, I saw this rug based on my design I had made while I was there. Pretty cool. (That was the Super Awesome Secretary who did that, not the PFH.)

I continued on to Fort Worth and saw this awesome sunset.

The clouds were really cool.

Saturday was Grandad's funeral. This is a picture of me with him and my grandmother last Christmas. He looks thrilled. :)

If you wonder what he was like, I caught him in the background of a picture later that afternoon showing a bit of his personality: wondering when he gets to go home. :)

That night my brother's dog got all cozy up in my legs.

Sunday afternoon I drove back to Little Rock. I got these two pictures of the progress of the new Dallas Cowboys Stadium in Arlington. It's coming along. And huge!

Then there was a really pretty sunset while driving back too.

And what's a trip without a funny thing. This was an ad on the back of the bathroom door at a truck stop. I really like the Indiana Jones hat, but I think the disclaimer at the bottom was written directly to me. My only question is, though, that if they are not responsible, who is?

Five Quick Things

1. I found out who my mystery guest is: my husband. Sneaky guy.
2. I now have $655 for my camera!
3. I had visitors to my blog today from Portugal, Turkey, Belgium, India, the United Kingdom, and France!
4. We are leaving tomorrow afternoon for Fort Worth for my grandfather's funeral. We'll be back on Sunday night.
5. In case you forgot...

That's THREE WEEKS from tonight! Whoop!

One Very Late Christmas Post

Christmas was over today because I finally gave the parents I work for their present. (Yes, Sarah, I know I haven't given you your gift either.) So here are the last three Christmas related photos.

I sent out a record number of cards this year: something around 45. A whole bunch of people sent them in return. I do love them and will keep the adorable pictures until next year. I bought the same card holder at Pier 1 as a bunch of other people, but took it in a whole new direction (horizontal).

Don't I have cute friends and their babies?

I made this adorable thing on my new Photoshop that I got for Christmas and had it printed in an 8x10 and put it in a frame and gave it to the boys' parents for Christmas (aka January 10th).

My Biggest Fan

Alright. Time to own up. Who is on here all of the time? The newest thing I added on here last week will tell me the list of every time a specific IP address comes on here. Somebody in Little Rock has been on here this often (that's the date, time, and how long they spent on the page):

Jan 8 2008 8:20pm 2m
Jan 8 2008 6:08pm <1m
Jan 8 2008 12:59am 5m
Jan 6 2008 4:11pm <1m
Jan 6 2008 1:25am 8m
Jan 5 2008 5:52pm 1m
Jan 4 2008 7:43pm <1m
Jan 4 2008 2:10am <1m
Jan 4 2008 1:12am 19m
Jan 3 2008 11:44pm 6m
Jan 3 2008 11pm 7m
Jan 3 2008 10:27pm <1m
Jan 3 2008 7:15pm <1m
Jan 3 2008 2:27pm <1m
Jan 3 2008 12:23pm <1m
Jan 3 2008 1:53am <1m

Well... who are you? (You do realize that I will know if you've been here and haven't told me who you are. Not that I will know who you are, but I'll know that you've been here.)

Kid Quotes 141-160

Sorry. I forgot about these. Here are the next 20. This is still first graders.

talking about the American Revolution...
"Yeah, we beat England twice. Once there and once at the Alamo!"

Me: Why do we have Independence Day on July 4th?
Kid: Because that's the day George Washington beat the whole world!

"Last night I dreamed that you took 10,000 minutes off our recess!"

Kid in other class after school: "My best friend is in your class. He's the one that came in and stood right here and then did something."
Me: "Who is it?"
Kid: "I don't remember his name."

first thing the six year old said when she walked in the door... "I'm wearing my mom's panties!"

Me: Before George Washington was president he fought to help make our country free.
Kid: You said fought.
Me: Yeah, fought.
Kid: You said FOUGHT!
Me: I know, fought is right.
Kid: That's not a word! It's not fought!
Me: Fought is right. You probably say it wrong and say "fighted". It's fought.
Kid: You said fought again! That's not right. It's fighted!
Me: I promise it's fought.
This continued for probably about two or three minutes...
Another kid: Yeah, it's fought!
Kid: Oh, ok.

"My grandpa has been in 10 or 20 wars and has never died!"

so Most Annoying Kid had been missing out of the room for about 15 minutes... I called to the library to see if he was still in there, but he wasn't so I then headed to the bathroom to investigate. I called into the bathroom... "MAK?" "yeah?" "are you alright?" "yeah." "hurry up, you've been in there a long time" "ok". So I head back to the room and am most of the way down the hall when I hear yelling down the hall "Miss Hartman!" from the bathroom. So I go back down and am almost there and say "yes, MAK? are you ok?" and he replies, in shouting mode, for all to hear...
"There's peanuts in my poop!"

First Grader Thoughts on Kissing:
"You have to wear chapstick when you kiss."

"Kissing is just like this. (she quickly kisses her desk) Smooching is kissing for a long time."

"When you get married, are you allowed to kiss then?"

"Boys do too wear lipstick! Because when they kiss a girl they get it on them."

"If it's below zero, you can't kiss your husband or you'll get stuck that way for a really long time."
Other teacher: How was your day?
Interrupting kids: Gooooood
Other teacher: How was YOUR day?
Me: Second day in a row of not going to recess because of rain? It was FANTASTIC!
Kid: Nu-uh! It was no-tastic!

Kid 1: She's putting up her middle finger!
Kid 2: We put up our middle finger to Ohio when we moved away from it.
Me: "?!"
Kid 2: What? We did!

Kid: Your ring is as pretty as... a tree!
Me: Pretty as a tree?
Kid: Prettier!

"These shoes are really old! I've had them since I got them!"

"How do you spell "uh"?"
(me: "uh?")
"Yeah, like 'I have uh dog'"

Kid: How do you spell m?
Me: M?!
Kid: Yeah, like the letter m.
Me: um, M!
Kid: oh.

"When girls get all frilly, how come they get all googly-eyed?"

New Love Song

D really likes me. He also really likes Star Wars. He also has really bad hair here.

A Week Late

I finally got Alisa's pictures so now I can post about...
New Year's Eve!

The girls and Jon were playing Phase 10 and in the midst of a very strange way of shuffling the cards, Jon readjusted in his chair...

And broke the leg.

Candice and Melissa thought it was very funny.


The boys were in the other room playing Guitar Hero. Or pretending to play guitar hero.

Then around 1:00am we went in to try it. Alisa went first.

Then I played. I apparently looked like either Gwen Stefani or Avril Lavigne.

First ever attempt: FAILED!

Second attempt: Passed with a B (82%).

Today when I got the pictures on my e-mail I let D play with this one on Paint.
Featuring (according to D):
My black teeth because they have cavities
My light blue angry eyebrows
A giant head on the wall that's mad I'm playing guitar hero
Lots and lots of light sabers (all of the long straight lines)
A small light saber fight in the bottom left corner
Green hand
A duck (above my head)
A piece of popcorn (at the bottom of my right leg)

Funny Things of Late

This bothers me in several ways: This sign was in a museum. It's horrible grammar. Someone had to DRAW IN the apostrophe in it's. I somehow covered part of the lens. Am I 85 years old?

These are three pictures that I'm turning in to one of my new favorite sites.
Two weird things about this sign: the capital G and the quotation marks.

Quotation marks? What are they REALLY?

What they really mean is "Only if your car is one of a few models."

Santa also says, "Learn subject-verb agreement."

I'm thinking these stickers aren't worn too much at this church. (aka the school the boys go to)

1. "Mexican Store... Tacos"
2. EL Jarocho & LA JAROCHA
3. Abarrotes translated means "packings"

Nativity Scene in a Box... on January 6th.

For those of you who don't understand how the American tax system works, they are extra.

He really was!

Well if it works for shaq, then I must try it.

One sign laid over another sign that says the same thing. Hm.

Pretty obviously a poor choice in garage sale marketing.

I love anything that has an "o'" in it.