Kid Quotes 21-40

"A&M? that's kinda like M&M, except it's A&M"

"In 18 years Miss Hartman is going to look so so so different."

Setting: in the middle of a game of Math Bingo.
What happened: the kid blurts out...
"I like ham."
Me: "Did you say 'I like ham'?"
Kid: "Yeah, like from pigs. You know that ham comes from pigs right?"
Me: "Yes, so does bacon, sausage, pork chops..."
Kid: "Beef"
Me: "No, beef comes from cows"
Kid: "I know. I'm just naming meat."

"Miss Hartman, you look married today"
("I look married?")
"Yeah, you look almost the same, but you look married. And you sound married."

Me: "Hogs are like pigs."
Kid: "My dad is one of those. He's a hog. He likes to eat lots of things."

"Do you know what my mom is bring for the party? Sugar cookies. Home made! Except she has to go to the store and buy the dough first."

"Is there such a thing as 18,000?"

"Stewed tomatoes give me the squirts."

"You smell like Dr. Pepper... no... Diet Dr. Pepper."

"Oatmeal Creme Pies give me heartburn."

Me: What was the best thing you did over Christmas break?
Kid 1: We fed the reindeer glitter and oatmeal.
Kid 2: I met my twin brother. He's 24. That's not very old. You have to be 30 to get married.

Me: This book is by (whoever) Lopez
Kid: That's almost like JLo Lopez. My dad likes her.

"You can't drink diet coke! Because then you can't get a car!"

Q: What did the meat say to the coffee?
A: If you coffee me one more time, you're gonna be dead meat.

"Santa Claus really is a Christian, because he brought me a penny with a cross on it."

"Me and Other Kid got the same book, except mine's different. It has a different title."

"When you grow up, you have to kiss a girl by the time you're 33."

Me: Molly, why does your shirt have a V on it?
Molly: I don't know. Maybe it stands for violet.
Me: But your name doesn't begin with a V.
Molly: Well, I could change my name to V‑Molly!

"This book doesn't have very good graphics."